Here’s Proof That An Exotic Car Won’t Melt In The Rain

There comes a time in the life of every aspiring journalist when he must put himself at risk of great personal peril in order to bring you a major developing story. Some go to treacherous riot zones and cover dangerous looting. Others go undercover to bring you tales of corruption and greed. As for me, I recently had… » 9/17/14 3:56pm Wednesday 3:56pm

For God’s Sake, Take Off Your Dealer License Plate Frame

I'll tell you when I first realized that we have a serious problem. It was just a few days ago, when I came up behind a car in traffic with one of those enormous plastic license plate frames. Printed on top was the name of the dealer – something like "ANDERSON MOTORS." And on the bottom, in the same enormous font,… » 9/16/14 4:06pm Tuesday 4:06pm

Here’s Why Philadelphia Is a Terrible Place For a Ferrari

When I announced a few months ago that I was moving to Philadelphia, several of you readers chimed in with excellent tips and suggestions. "Watch out for the potholes!" one said. "Be careful of the potholes!" said another. "You need to buy a gun," said a third. » 9/11/14 3:43pm 9/11/14 3:43pm

Here’s Why Free Maintenance Is Just a Marketing Gimmick

A friend of mine recently purchased a Toyota Corolla. Here's how it happened: my friend came up to me one day and said "I'm going to purchase a Toyota Corolla!" And I replied: "OH GOD NO!! WHY??!? HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF?? TO SOCIETY?? TO HUMANITY!?? YOU ARE RUINING EVERYTHING THAT'S RIGHT WITH THE WORLD!!" » 9/09/14 3:47pm 9/09/14 3:47pm

Here’s How a Flawless $300,000 Diamond Was Lost In an F1 Car Crash


If you spend enough time writing on the Internet, you'll eventually be accused of creating a "clickbait" headline. You know what I'm talking about: the headline mentions a revolutionary new advancement in modern technology, something that will change our lives forever, a feat of engineering that will alter the course… » 9/03/14 3:30pm 9/03/14 3:30pm

Here’s What Happened When I Drove 900 Miles In a Fully-Loaded U-Haul

I recently completed a 900-mile move from Atlanta to Philadelphia. It was long, and arduous, and difficult, and I spent a large portion of it wishing I could claw my eyes out with a flathead screwdriver. Here I'm referring to the part of the move where I had to deal with Comcast. » 9/02/14 3:23pm 9/02/14 3:23pm

I Saw All The Cool Stuff At Pebble Beach Without Spending a Dime

Ahh, the Pebble Beach Concours d'Elegance: America's finest annual automotive event held under a constant stream of light mist. Oh, sure, I know the Amelia Island Concours is an excellent event with wonderful vehicles. But nothing can quite top Pebble Beach if you're discussing, for instance, overall umbrella usage. » 8/21/14 4:20pm 8/21/14 4:20pm

Here’s What Happened When I Went Hypermiling In a Honda Insight

I recently had the chance to spend a few hours driving around in a Honda Insight. Not the new Insight – or the "sissy Insight," as I now call it, due to its gluttonous 5-seat configuration and its greedy, environment-destroying 4-cylinder engine that's designed to actually keep pace with traffic. I mean the original » 8/13/14 4:29pm 8/13/14 4:29pm

Here’s What Happens When Two Women Drive Around In a Ferrari



A few months back, I posted a video that shows me driving around in the Ferrari, desperately trying to get attention from women. And it shows women completely ignoring my efforts. The whole thing is depressing, and disappointing, and in the end, I crash the Ferrari into a day spa while screaming: "DO YOU NOTICE ME… » 8/06/14 3:45pm 8/06/14 3:45pm

My Horn Stopped Working: Another CarMax Warranty Update

So I'm driving along the other day, and I get up behind this woman in a Passat with out-of-state plates. This poor woman: it was raining, it was late at night, and she probably had no idea how to get around in the big, unfamiliar city. She was lost, confused, disoriented, unsure of herself. » 8/05/14 3:42pm 8/05/14 3:42pm

Here’s Why Kia Is The Biggest Threat to Mercedes-Benz

It's one of life's simple truths: automotive journalists get to have all the fun. You know it. Your friends know it. Your wife knows it. And now, I especially know it, because I recently got the chance to spend a few days driving the all-new Kia Forte. It was an excellent experience, and I strongly recommend that… » 7/30/14 3:35pm 7/30/14 3:35pm

Getting Gas Is The Hardest Part Of Owning An Exotic Car

Most car guys are a little curious about the exotic car ownership experience. How does it drive on a race track? What does it sound like at full throttle in a long, glorious tunnel? How fast can you get it going on an empty highway? Well, those are all excellent questions, and today I've decided to ignore each of… » 7/29/14 3:30pm 7/29/14 3:30pm

The Citroen C-Elysee Is The Worst Car I've Ever Driven

I recently paid $904.61 in order to spend a week behind the wheel of the worst car I've ever driven. It was a highly interesting experience, and I'd surely do it again, provided that my only alternate form of transportation involves getting dragged around for a while by an angry gorilla. » 7/24/14 3:05pm 7/24/14 3:05pm

The Craziest Unreliable Cars You Can Get With a CarMax Warranty

I've rounded up a few more exciting unreliable CarMax warranty-able cars for you to gawk at because the last time we did this you were all tremendously excited about the prospect of buying these exciting, historically unreliable used cars available with a long warranty. Prepare to get even more excited because I have … » 7/09/14 3:30pm 7/09/14 3:30pm

Here Are The Best Comments And Messages I've Gotten So Far

As some of you are no doubt aware, I am currently on vacation. This means I've interrupted my usual schedule of a) waking up late, and b) sitting around the house no pants on, just so I could spend thousands of dollars to fly half-way around the world, where I am a) waking up late, and b) sitting around the house… » 7/08/14 2:45pm 7/08/14 2:45pm